Trash to Treasure Tuesday~

While blog perusing one of my many bookmarked favorite blogs, I came across this photo of this old-old patriotic umbrella. Blogged about here.LOVE IT.... WANT IT.... TO CHEAP TO BUY IT~ So whats a girl to do but make a cheap imitation of the real thing :-) Luckily, I spotted this tiny painted silk umbrella at a yard sale. Price? .25cents...I measured and taped off sections of the umbrella with some masking tape. (lurve that stuff~) then just painted on a few coats of acrylic paint. I cut out a star stencil using card stock and just painted in the stars. Once that was all dry-- and blindingly white....I mudded it up with some brown acrylic paint and then closed up the umbrella and dirtied up the sides using black & brown ink. It looks very heavily aged due to the light & flash, but if you were to view it in person it isn't so dark.

I also made an American Flag with pickets off of the white picket fence that is in my front yard... I got tired of it and it is currently sitting in my garage!

This wooden American Flag below, I made using some thin wavey wood that you tuck under that plastic wavey stuff that some use for patio covers.... (whatever that stuff is called) it was like a dollar something a piece and comes in 6' lengths. I just cut each piece in two, nailed it to a few pieces of wood across the back.... It is now sitting in my garage as well...lol
Thats my patriotic Trash to Treasure! If you stop back tomorrow, I'll show you how to make gazebo bunting using sheets-- that is soooooo easy-peasy! You can see more Trash to Treasure by visiting Kimm over at her "Reinvented" Also, by visiting Diane over at "A Picture is worth 1,000 words" If you've linked here and wish to view more of my blog... you can click here~

Mod Podge Linky party~

There is an end of the month Mod Podge linky party being hosted by "This is the year" It is sooo worth a lookie-loe...especially if you love Mod podge-ing~ Here are some things I've created using the stuff over the past month. I mod podged a super cute 4th of July hanger. You can read more about that here. I got a new lock & key for my screen door and the key looked like every other key I have on my keychain.....so I mod podged it. You can read more about that here. Here is my take on paper mache using Mod podge. You can read more about my Mad Hatter cheshire cat here. Also, I mod podged this little Mad Hatter's tea pot. It has my 4 month old grandaughter inside of it. You can read more about that here.I also used Mod Podge as a sealant on some party hats for the tea party. I made these for my outdoor statues. You can read more about that here.

VACATION MEMORIES: PELTING THE BEARS

I’m on a break for a couple of weeks. Not exactly on vacation. More of on a Quest that’ll either turn out to be very interesting or a total disaster. More on that soon.

I also decided not to write about TV for a couple of weeks. With the CRTC making some major announcements on July 6, I figured I should use this time to clear my head, do a few curls and crunches and get ready for what looks to be “The Big One” – or at least “The Next One”.

Given some of the pre-announcement posturing by some members of the Commission, it would appear they didn’t get the Heritage Committee memo to take “all of a media conglomerates” holdings into account when determining who needs assistance and what kind.

Being servants to the broadcasters seems to be the only job these people think they have.

Anyway, while I’m on my “Quest” I decided to recall some of my favorite vacation memories. Maybe it’ll give those of you who have some free time this summer a few ideas.

When I was a kid in Saskatchewan in the early 60’s, the place my parents usually took my brother and I was Lake Waskesiu in the Prince Albert National Park.

Around the time I turned 10, my mom and dad took up golf. Back then, most Saskatchewan golf courses adapted to the dry weather and lack of water access by not having grass greens.

Instead, the “greens” were a mixture of sand and oil, pressed into a firm flat surface with a garden roller set nearby to erase the footprints and ball impressions of the players once they had finished the hole.

So your second shot likely landed either in the dry sand of a trap or the wet sand where you then putted out. And if the guys behind you were annoying, you just left them some footprints to try to putt around for a birdie.

But Waskesiu had a great course with real greens, so my folks always looked forward to shooting a round or two there each summer.

From the point of view of my brother and I, it was just a great place to swim, canoe to Grey Owl’s cabin, ride horses – and pelt the bears.

One of my contemporaries, Blue Collar Comic Jeff Foxworthy, has a great routine about how parents in our day seemed to have no regard whatsoever to the dangers the world held for us kids. While modern laws demand seat belts, harnesses and car seats for example; Jeff, like me, can recall riding all the way to Florida in the back window of a car.

Among my toys were lethal steel tipped lawn darts, a wood burning iron and a chemistry set that more than once sent my buddies and I scrambling from the basement ahead of some brown toxic cloud.

Parents just didn’t seem to care.

I guess they were from a generation that had dodged artillery and sniper fire and somehow playing with a BB gun or a jack knife just didn’t hardly seem worth a lot of anxiety.

Likewise, the first couple of days of our Waskesiu vacations were spent with them searching out a couple with kids approximately our age, having a few drinks with them and then handing us over to their care and supervision.

On the days mom and dad played golf, we went off with the new couple to do whatever they were doing and then their kids were with us while they went off to shoot skeet or make Molotov cocktails.

Somehow, a couple of Rye and Cokes was all it took to determine that these strangers were not child molesters or looking to sell us into white slavery.

And so we’d head off to bike, horseback ride or rock climb (all without a helmet) and if anybody did need a few stitches at the end of the day – well, what kid doesn’t take a header every now and then.

But looking back on it all, there was one nightly event that now seems utterly, completely insane. But was by far the most fun of going camping.

After dinner, once the white hot coat hangers we roasted weenies on had been put away, we all piled in the car to go to the nearby garbage dump and pelt the bears.

You see, every night, just before dusk, anywhere from eight to a dozen large black bears would come out of the woods and go through the garbage the park staff had dumped in a deep ditch at the end of some lonely forest road miles from the nearest hospital or infirmary.

Carloads of campers would roll up and while the parents sat inside the warm cars, warding off the growing chill by sipping coffee or their first of the evening; all of us kids would get out and scamper to the waist high wood railing that marked the edge of the pit to watch the feeding.

And, not twenty feet from these creatures, we’d laugh and cheer as they shredded trash bags, rent cans with their claws and feasted on the refuse.

What’s more, we’d all brought a couple of apples, baked potatoes or uneaten sandwiches that we’d toss to (or more accurately “at”) the bears, squealing with delight if we managed to draw them closer with the possibility of eating something less “tangy” than what was in the garbage bags.

More than once, I can recall one of my surrogate summer fathers calling out “Bean the Big One!” between chain smokes. And, of course, we would.

Somehow, nobody ever got chased, flayed or eaten.

And despite the disrespectful, environmentally irresponsible behavior, what I also vividly recall are moments when the proximity and uniqueness of the experience made you realize just how special these animals really were.

And -- once we were out of things to throw at the bears, our parents would take us back to the camp where big granite rocks had been heating on the fire embers.

And while we roasted bedtime marshmallows, our parents would tuck those almost molten rocks in our sleeping bags to keep us warm until morning –- when, instead of frostbite, we’d be treated for second degree burns before heading off to a day at the beach without sun block.

Yeah, life was a lot simpler then…

And somehow, we managed to survive –- with stories that kids today will never be able to tell.

Chloe Rose....

Little Chloe Rose was caught wearing a tamborine as a party hat at her Mad Hatter Tea Party....

Lazy Sunday # 77: Paparazzi

There are generally two kinds of people in this business. Those who are creative and those who feed off them.

Please don't read that assessment as being harsh. Because that which the creatives create is meant to be consumed and exploited and copied and used to provide a livlihood or cultural enrichment for others.

But lately an entire industry has stepped to the fore wherein the creatives themselves are consumed, leaving less worth exploiting and a pervasive feeling of emptiness.

We call this industry Gossip or tabloid journalism or the cult of celebrity, with that last term accurately defining it as a false religion. A false religion whose high priests are called the Paparazzi.

It's gotta be tough making your living capturing, manufacturing and trying to sell celebrity news. One week you have a movie star making a salacious exit via a hotel closet with all the shock value you can dream of, but choosing a closet so far away that some Bangkok weekly scoops you with "the good stuff" and makes you look twice as shameless in the process.

The next you're run off your feet as big names drop like flies without regard to deadlines or previously crafted specials and eulogies.

And not being all that creative, you need to scramble to find something to say, opting for questions like "What's the mood of the family?" revealing either your own lack of intelligence, empathy and life experience or how stupid and out of touch with themselves you believe your audience must be.

And then some little floozie you thought you helped make famous, calling herself Lady Gaga, comes along and simultaneously nails and outdoes what you're all about in seven minutes of inspired creativity with more eye-popping moments than an entire season of pretty much any reined in and micro-managed television series.

This is somebody creative operating at the inspired level.

Drink your fill as she intended.

And enjoy your Sunday.

Lady Gaga - Paparazzi
by UniversalMusicGroup

Mad Hatter's Tea Party~

Welcome to the Mad Hatter's Tea Party.... I am hosting this event in my 4 month old grandaughter, Chloe-Rose's Garden. Would you look who is already waiting at the front gate? Why it is none other than the Cheshire cat. The white rabbit will sound the horn announcing each new guest. I imagine the neighbors are delighted to hear such reveille so early in the morning!!Gate is now open... Welcome!I have put out some blankets, umbrellas and party hats if your wanting to partake in such frivolousness. My-oh-my.... would you look at Alice? This is what you get people for putting Brandy in your tea! Nightie-nite Alice, sleep it off girl~We ask that you please teather your high horses at the front gate... Absolutely no high-horse'ing around in this garden!I see the squirral family has shown up.... that family grows & grows each year ten fold!
Look to your left and you'll see cat & bird chatting up a storm. Those two are such chatter-boxes!Poor rabbit is running-a-muck as the caterer is running late~ This is the last time I hire "The Mad Hatter" to cater any of my events! Off with his head! or any other appendage I see fit~Grap a cuppa off of the teacup tree. We are totally doing a casual tea here in Chloe's garden as its hard to be a hostess when your holding your grandchild in your arms~ Please feel free to pull a fresh lemon off of one of the many lemon trees as well. We have flown in the Baby Blues Cockroach Band for this event. They are setting a delightful ambiance with their smooth sounds. Here you see white rabbit joining in with the band for a few songs~My-my-my...poor Alice staggered over to the cuppa tree and had to take another wee nap. Poor girls needing rehab~Cat and duck are not ones to gossip, but hey-- isn't that the added bonus of attending such a large event? The ever present opportunity to see someone make a fool out of themselves? Preferably someone other than yourself!
There is a little table set up with some sugared fruit and some hot raspberry tea. Watch out for that little pixie who lives inside that teapot on the table...she will positively talk you into adding extra sugar to your tea. She has such a sweet nature about her. She has sugared cranberries, sugared mint leaves and then your basic sugar cube. *gasp* Would you look at that...she is kicking sugared cranberries into tea cups... Ladies, hands over your cups! The little stinker is dancing under the spell of a sugar high!My~my where has the time gone.... party is wrapping up. Thank you very much for coming into my grandaughter's garden and having some tea with us. It has been fun visiting with everyone. On your way out, be sure to take one of the rocks set out by the gate. A person can never have to many rocks you know~ Please visit with Vanessa over at "A Fanciful Twist" to partake in more tea party madness~

Life After Farrah

I was living and working in Hollywood in the late 1970’s during the tail end of what was probably the golden age of iconic prime time television. The big hits were M*A*S*H*, Dallas, The Dukes of Hazard, Taxi, Happy Days, The Incredible Hulk, CHiPs and, of course, Charlie’s Angels.

Cotton candy television for the most part. Shows with big budgets and big stars. Every one of them had a familiar theme, great title sequences, popular catch-phrases, cars blowing up and guest stars just as well known as the regular casts.

More people probably tuned in to their lowest rated summer repeat episodes than are currently counted on first run series considered hugely successful. They connected with huge audiences and dictated taste and fashion and fads across North America and around the world.

One of the most important things any successful television series requires is getting its iconography right. The audience has to be able to see one promo or even a single photo in a newspaper or magazine and “get” what you’re selling.

Nobody did that better than “Charlie’s Angels”.

The photo above is from an episode called “Angels in Chains”. Kinda says it all, doesn’t it?

Pretty girls in jeopardy on a chain gang yet without one hair out of place. The prurient thrill of “Women Behind Bars” combined with cheerleader innocence in a way that said nobody was really going to get hurt – or corrupted.

At the center of that photograph stands an actress who also personified what American television was selling back then, the perfect California blonde; the kind of woman who populated discos, roller rinks and the center sections of Playboy.

Farrah Fawcett hit television like a bombshell. Although she’d been around for years, guesting on dozens of series and being a semi-regular on “Harry O” and her husband Lee Majors’ series “The Six Million Dollar Man” nobody really seemed to notice her until she became one of Charlie’s girls.

And then it was like there was nobody else. She not only captured the iconography of the series, but in posing for a poster for a photographer friend, tousling her hair in front of a Mexican blanket, she became an icon for the entire culture of the 1970’s.

That poster was everywhere. And I mean everywhere. Locker rooms. Restaurants. The bedrooms of both sexes. Looking at it now, you can’t figure out why. But looking at it in the late 70’s you just knew she was it. That was beauty. That was perfection. That was what every man wanted and every woman aspired to be.

Farrah Fawcett was one of those moments in time. Mostly forgettable before and after, but absolutely perfect in that one instant.

I didn’t watch “Charlie’s Angels” much. And when a friend who was guesting on an episode asked if I wanted to visit the set, my main reason for going was to meet director Lawrence Dobkin, famous not so much for being a good TV director but as the guy who weekly uttered the immortal line “There are eight million stories in the Naked City. This has been one of them.”

The “Angels” set was on the 20th Century Fox lot and when I arrived, I was almost run over by Harry Morgan, Col. Potter from M*A*S*H*, who careened up in a jeep and in costume. It was one of those moments where you wondered if that had been his quickest way to get to the front gate from the set or he really went home that way.

The “Angels” studio was no different from any other working studio or television set I’ve been on before or since. People professionally going about their business or socializing around the fringes while waiting for their next scene or set up.

Farrah had left the series after one season, encouraged to make the leap to features by her sudden fame and had been replaced by Cheryl Ladd. Her desertion had scandalized the tabloid press who filled the checkout counters with endless headlines about her bad behavior, out of control ego, etc. etc. etc.

But none of the people she’d left behind had a single bad word to say about her. Indeed they were thrilled that she was coming back in a couple of weeks to do a guest shot, something she did annually for the run of the series.

It was my first introduction to the difference between what you read or heard about the entertainment scene and what actually went on. What was written about Farrah was no more true then than what’s written about Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan or anybody else these days. 

In the reality of the real Hollywood, Farrah’s sudden fame had given her opportunities previously unavailable to her and not one person she was working with begrudged her that or hoped she’d fall on her face for moving on.

And while the tabloids debated whether Cheryl could fill Farrah’s shoes or have her impact, the clear mood on the set was, “We got a job to do. The new girl’s part of the team. Let’s make some television.”

These people were proving what one of my theatre teachers had tried to ingrain in all of his students. “This isn’t about fame. It isn’t about Art. It’s a job. Whether what you do is considered a success or determined to be of cultural importance is out of your hands. Other people decide those things. Your job is simply to do the job.”

The movies Farrah left to do weren’t very good or very successful. Later on, she made several “comebacks” that saw her nominated for several Emmys and Golden Globes that she never won. But her icon status also saw her receive People’s Choice Awards and Razzies doubly cursed by her fame to symbolize both success and failure.

She also established herself as a continuing character for the Tabs, fodder for gossip, innuendo and derision simply because she’d once captured lightning in a bottle and in doing so had sparked the synapses of people incapable of firing them themselves.

Farrah Fawcett died today and no doubt will be eulogized as “important” by some and a “train wreck” by others.  Like all of us, she had her successes and failures both in her career and in life. But what no one can deny is that for one brief moment she epitomized all of our dreams and aspirations.

And while others wanted her to be more or less than she was, the truth of her life is this.

She did the job. And she did it well.

New keys~

I got a new lock for my front screen door recently...and of course it looked just like the other key on my keyring. I have nail polish on one key already (tacky, but effective) I wanted something more "me"...so I got out my stash of papers and Mod Podged my keys.Soooooooo meeeeeeeee!~ I simply glued on the paper, turned the key over and cut off the excess with my xacto knife. When I had both sides covered with paper, I put on three coats of Mod Podge letting each coat dry.

I did this for both sides of each key. Now...if you've used this Mod Podge before, your aware that when it dries it is slightly tacky. I always use spray gloss over the newly "Mod Podged" area and that seems to end the tackiness! taaaaaaaaaa daaaaaaaaaaa! Instant caute!! You can see more made-over things at Jen's monthly make-over party on her blog Sanctuary Arts at Home.

THEY SAVED HITLER’S BRAIN

In an example of how much Canadian broadcasting executives just don’t get it, CanWest issued a press release recently to announce changes to its specialty channels.

These included:

1. Turning out the lights at “Fine Living Canada”.

I guess people here aren’t living as fine as the Prime Minister seems to think.

2. Going after a larger male demographic on the, currently heavy with Wedding shows and Makeover shows and shows on Figuring-out-how-to-make-boys-like-us, Slice Channel.

Hint to Slice, most guys are uncomfortable with weddings and change but there are a couple of sure-fire ways to get them to like you -- if you really want to push the envelope.

3. Shifting The History Channel more to entertainment than historical documentaries.

4. TVtropolis won’t change because it can only run shows more than 10 years old and has to wait for whatever changed in the fall of 1999.

“Look, TVTropolis has got “Moesha”! Oooh, I hope it’s in High-Def!”

With regard to The History Channel, Michael Kot, VP of factual content at Canwest, said, "We've stopped being the Hitler channel.”

Actually, Mike – you just became exactly that!


When The History Channel was licensed in 1996, it came on the scene with a mandate to present historical documentaries and films with a special emphasis on documentary and dramatic programs related to Canada’s past. That was reiterated by the CRTC in 2004 when the channel’s license was renewed...

1. (a) The licensee shall provide a national English-language specialty service consisting of historical documentaries, movies, mini-series and history programs which embrace both current events and past history, with a special emphasis on documentary and dramatic programs related to Canada's past.

2. In each broadcast year, the licensee shall devote to the exhibition of Canadian programs not less than 50% of the broadcast day, and not less than 40% of the evening broadcast period.

Now, The History Channel has taken a long and storied end run around those terms of licence right from its beginning with movies that had little if any basis in fact beyond being set during some discernable point of human residence on this planet.

They became "The Hitler Channel" early on because, either unable or unwilling to invest in showcasing any portion of Canadian history which occurred prior to the invention of public domain film clips, they ended up running an endless number of documentaries on WWII.

A couple of years into their existence, any producer pitching a WWII project to History had to list the sources of their archival footage -- mostly because the same free or close to it material was turning up with tiresome regularity.

"Marge, didn't we see that same tank go through that same hedge earlier tonight -- and apparently in a completely different country?"

But rather than look for creative ways to live up to their mandate, the channel simply got creative in their justification of how you defined 'history'.

"CSI:NY" represented New York after the trauma of 9/11 although few episodes even mentioned that event.

"JAG" was a look at the work of the American Judge Advocate General's office, although most of the stories were concocted in LA writers rooms rather than military courts.

Or their current staple "NCIS" wherein the actual series has stopped pretending it has any basis in reality, let alone historical fact.

Despite getting slapped on the wrist for some of this by the CRTC, The History Channel just kept soldiering further from what it was licensed to do, simultaneously spitting in the faces of the CRTC Commissioners they knew were toothless and holding up the genre protection that regulator had granted them to prevent anybody else from delivering actual historical content.

And that's why The History Channel will always be, even without his constant presence, "The Hitler Channel".

You see, Adolf Hitler was an evil, conniving and lying little fuck who rose to and retained power via a propoganda tool he dubbed "The Big Lie".

The concept was to tell a lie so huge people would believe it because they wouldn't be able to comprehend somebody so egregiously misrepresenting the truth.

And then Hitler just kept repeating that lie until those saying something different became the ones who were not believed.

Adolf Hitler blamed Germany's pre-war problems on the Jews. The History Channel insists that running "NCIS" twice nightly during Primetime lives up to its broadcast mandate of educating and informing Canadians about history.

In fact, if you look at The History Channel's overall schedule, you're hard pressed to believe they're anywhere close to exhibiting Canadian programs "not less than 40% of the evening broadcast period".

And when barely any of those "Canadian" non-NCIS offerings deal with actual Canadian history, opting to explore urban legends, the T-Rex and Dracula, you begin to see that The History Channel has less interest in history than becoming yet another re-run platform for its corporate conglomerate's library.

As one of my visitors recently commented:

"Specialty channels are making rates of return of more than 20%.... Not hard to do when you regurgitate every property you've ever owned onto every channel it kinda almost maybe fits. Hey, we own 'Blue Murder'. It has women on it, so its a great fit for Showcase Diva AND it has people moving in it, so its a match for Showcase Action too! And its a cop show, so its PERFECT for Mystery as well."

Arguing that any of our Specialty Channels actually specialize within their genre is the current "Big Lie" in Canadian broadcasting, with The History Channel being perhaps the most hypocritical offender.

They may have gotten rid of Hitler, but they saved his brain.

Don't be surprised if the original "B" movie with that premise turns up on History in the near future -- probably on a double bill with "The Producers".

Mixed media tea pot

I've made a little tea pot with my grandaughter featured as a little "sugar fairy" Can you see her? Dancing amongst the sugar cubes & sugared mint leaves and sugared cranberries? I used pages from an old 1942's Alice in Wonderland book that I picked up for .25cents. Here is a close-up of Chloe Rose.... the photo is a smidge dark-- I may replace it with another lighter one. I made the dress using crepe paper, it is very puffy 3 dimensional~

Treasure hunting....

Sometimes you just have to get up and go treasure hunting whenever the "feeling" hits you right? Right. I spotted this pretty vase with flowers... held it... put it back on the shelf.Then I saw she had a sista! Both went into my cart. $4 bucks each~I picked up these two matching plaster candle stick holders. They are needing some minor repair, nothing a smidge of paper clay some wax removeal and a shabby paint job can't fix. $2.50 each~An aluminum bowlie for $3, and the huge lot of premade bows for only $3~

A Marie Antoinette doll for $3~

And lastly, a chenille crib size baby blanket $3~

Foam core bunny...

I really enjoy working with foam core. I always pick up at least 5 sheets of it whenever it is on sale at Michaels for only a buck. It is really easy to work with...and cuts easily with a sharp razor. Here I've made a bunny blowing a horn-- I am going to use this for the tea party. The collar is made with squares of crepe paper puffed up then stuck on. The bunny has a crepe paper bow as well. You know the secret to making a bow with crepe paper? Something that will last-- you use packing tape. Pull off a large section of tape, place the crepe paper onto the tape and burnish it well. You end up with a fabulous piece of strong crepe paper to work with. I would like to make a lot of things for the tea party...but time is getting away from meeeeeee.... I guess I'm like that bunny with the time piece in his hand running around! hmmmmmmmmm I should make one of those as well!

I've also finished making party hats for every single statue I have in my garden...whew~ No easy feat as every single statue had a different head size and some had ears...and their little heads are tilted. Here is the last batch~ I just used card stock and made a cone shape then covered each with a piece of scrapbook paper. Then I put a coat of Mod Podge over each cone shape so they wouldn't get ruined if they got wet. I am wanting these little party hats to last at least until the end of summer! Now I've just got to add ribbons to each newly made hat and tie them on my little garden darlings and put them out in the garden. These are all going into my newly named "Chloe's garden"...after my grandaughter of course. Speaking of Chloe...here she is sitting all casually, foot dangling-head tilted to the t.v. (of course)

MAKING LEMONADE

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, pee in it, and serve it to the people that piss you off. (Jack Handy)

LAZY SUNDAY # 76: iPredict

This week I watched three different television news services, CNN, CTV and Newsworld all run segments in which the anchors were awed by the Twitter–ed uprising in Iran. They marvelled at the ability of a repressed population to get around the brutally restrictive practices of their government to share information and get their stories out to the rest of the world, achieving what these organizations could not.

The parallels to Canadian television were boggling.

And while I was struck by the fact that none of these guys were spending their airtime on the real news happening in Iran or even trying to overcome the Twitter advantage in covering it, I also realized that they were missing the next big story.

We don’t need TV news anymore.

And that’s not because most of it has devolved into predictably argumentative talking heads and watching airliners that aren’t really in trouble make uneventful landings at foreign airports.

Whether your “Smartphone” is an iPhone, a Blackberry or Pre, you can now install Apps that let you read newspapers, listen to radio from all over the planet, get video directly from Youtube or Reuters and receive Tweets on where the next rally against oppression is happening.

I’ve got an App called Feeds on my iTouch that allows me to read every blog, news or sports website I follow pretty much wherever I plop my butt of an afternoon to get a cup of coffee.

I don’t need to wait for the top of the hour, the 20-20 updates or try to hang in for any breaking “news at eleven”. I get what I want where and when I want it.

And I get it on the same device that gives me traffic reports for the specific section of road I’m driving, warnings on where the speed traps are and maps that pinpoint the best local pizzeria.

That little device sits unobtrusively on my desk, providing music when I write, tracking for something I’ve shipped, games I can play while I’m on hold or talking to somebody boring and that beeps when I’m supposed to be leaving for an appointment or so I can get out of that boring conversation.

I can’t remember the last time the TV in my office was even on for any other reason except watching dailies.

Over the past month, Canadians have been deluged with pleas to save local television as networks bartered with regulators over how much local news they’re prepared to provide where and when.

But maybe that’s all just so much ancient history. Maybe we’re past needing our television networks to even attempt providing the news. More and more it seems that be the story local or of international importance they can’t do it justice anyway.

Maybe we should just let them concentrate on saving themselves by providing the series, movies and specialty shows that apparently make them all of their money and continue delivering it to those large stationary boxes in the corner of the living room.

But then…

I can already download most of the shows they broadcast and all of the movies they won’t be able to show for up to a couple of years to my mobile devices and zap them to the TV from there.

Major League Baseball even has a new App that will bring me live television broadcasts direct from any of their ballparks.

Gee…

Maybe we don’t need TV networks anymore.

And why should I have to purchase bundles and search around for their channel or even access their online portal for content when I can just Google “Bill Cunningham” press a link and download his latest from iTunes, Netflix, Amazon or maybe directly from him?

And if we don’t need TV networks anymore. Maybe we don’t need cable companies either.

Jim Shaw, maybe you ought to be nicer to those Superchannel guys. They could be right behind you in the line to get into Alberta’s next job fair.

While I know TV isn’t going anywhere for a while, this week’s events have made it clear it’s stale date is being rapidly pushed closer.

And all the rhetoric of needing to “monetize” the internet and mobile services before they become a competitive system that can employ us creative types sounds more hollow each time a new App is created to deliver something else to that smartphone.

I’m predicting that in the future you won’t pay for a specific film or web offering, you’ll simply pay for the dedicated App that allows you to view it.

There.

I just successfully monetized the internet.

Excuse me while I set up a bank account in the Caymans to handle the royalties you all owe me.

But seriously. Can you make a profit at 99 cents a movie purchase? Why not? If your potential audience is everybody in the world with a smartphone and there are no distributors and exhibitors taking 60% off the top, trust me, that system’s making money for us creatives.

Think about it.

Because the guys below are going to become very wealthy doing just that.

And pray for those people Twittering from Iran.

And enjoy your Sunday. 

Cheshire cat~

I finally finished my cheshire cat for the upcoming "blog-linky" Mad Hatter's tea party that is going to be held on June the 27th. I started with balled up newspaper taped into a cat shape, the cat form is sitting on top of a foam core base. I used wooden stir sticks under each leg and the tail to keep those parts from ever falling off. I covered the form with strips of newspaper using equal parts of flour and water as the "glue" Once that was completely dried, I tore strips from a brown paper bag and used mod podge as the glue to make it a harder surface. Once that was all dry, I used paper clay to make the details in the face. (I highly recommend trying paper clay-- love it) The white areas are the paper clay. I used it on the face, feet and the tail. (I later decided the tail was tooooo fat, so I tore it apart and made it thinner)Anywho.... once the face & paws had dried, I covered the body with joint compound. I didn't want the lines from the paper showing when the cat was painted. Here is my cat covered with the joint compound-- the "worn" areas are from sanding the compound smooth. I then covered the entire thing with mod podge to seal the joint compound so it wouldn't be so easily damaged. (you can scratch that stuff easily with your finger nail)Here it is with a coat of paint... and some of the stripes that I painted on. I just used masking tape as a quide. Once everything was painted, I sprayed on some high gloss sealer to finish it up. I was wanting the look of something made with that heavy plastic like they make the rides out of at Disneyland. I think the high gloss gives it that look! The butt area ended up looking like a bullseye-- which makes me laugh-- a happy accident, so of course I had to embellish it even more.... Here is the backside all painted with a center bullseye added-- toooooooo funny~ (and yesssssss, I am a cat lover, I have 3)